Month: April 2018

recently i was doing some reading for my astrology practice. dane rudyahr’s ‘Astrology of Transformation: A Multilevel Approach’ starts with a treatise on two different ways of interacting with the world and the spectrum these two qualities create. yin and yang. of course we fluctuate between these two different types. sometimes observing our environment (yin) and other times manipulating it (yang). i’m learning to observe how i choose to interact with the world.  it’s feeling more fluid and as i act in different ways different responses are illicited. i can stop myself from barreling along a path destroying anything in my way to get ahead. as i sit here typing these words Ben Sollee’s ‘Learn to Listen’ is playing, which is so appropriate regarding how i have been choosing to interact with the world lately. I’m learning to pause and ask myself how I want to approach each and every situation. not only is this new philosophical perception changing my day to day life it is also changing how i show up to the massage table.

 

‘a yin type of person is primarily concerned with the relationship between the entities or forces involved in a meeting, rather than with what this meeting will do to his or her self or ego, because the person seeks to understand what function this relationship is meant to perform within a larger frame of reference- a family or community, a nation and its culture, mankind and the whole Earth and ultimately the process of evolution of the cosmos.’ pg. 11 of The Astrology of Transformation

i’ve been humbly approaching massage from a yin perspective. i go into a session with no expectations as i’m sure a lot of massage therapists already do. i am not one of them- not all the time at least. i usually go in with an agenda. somewhere i’m going to work. how i’m going to start. definite areas i want to get to. responses i want to get from the client.

what would happen if I was to approach each client from a place of: huh, this is showing up. how curious, how interesting. paying attention instead of checking off areas i’ve worked from the list made before even laying hands on the person. what is the body saying to me in this moment? yes the person complains of low back pain but just behind this ear is really asking for attention. paying attention and of course making sure the person on the table is enjoying it- thats part of the process- for the person on the table to be having an experience of joy, good hurt or whatever is most beneficial for them in the moment. it truly is about the client but what happens when i approach it from a more go with the flow type of attitude? to get out of my own routine. to show up to the massage and see what happens. to allow myself to bend and flow with the energy of the moment the energy of the client the energy of myself because after all my clients are mirrors to myself and my own issues. what shows up and can I be delighted by it, even if it questions all of my somatic beliefs? not having expectations not having desire for results or the person to like me but to be as honest as I can with the person’s body and my body and the desires I have within me. do i want to fix this person? why? do i want to fix all pain in the world at all places… yes most massage therapists would say that.. is it possible? no. pain is necessary, i can expose someone to their pain in a new way. in a way they maybe didn’t look at it before but in order to do that i cannot have an agenda.  if i have an agenda and i go to ‘fix’ their pain they may continue to look at it as something to be conquered instead of something to be listened to.

… it can be said the the experiencer and the experience ‘are one’. The instinctual and intellectual reactions we call resistance vanish; where resistance was, meaning now arises: resistance is transmuted into meaning.’ pg. 13 of The Astrology of Transformation

I was so grateful to this short passage, i encourage you to seek the book out and read it for yourself. it is helping me tremendously in the treatment room and most importantly in how i approach life in general.

altered states of consciousness…

the feeling of floating within your body as well as within the universe.

i recently received a reiki session. oftentimes reiki is lost on me. i don’t feel much, usually left feeling underwhelmed. almost less relaxed because i feel as though i have wasted my time. harsh maybe, but honest nonetheless. i’m a very critical person, which i know i have to look at, quite possibly by doing so i would be able to relax more… this week, i stopped by The Ruby Tree on a friend’s recommendation. i just recently broke up with my boyfriend and have been feeling a bit vulnerable, i needed to be touched and by someone whom i didn’t know. a stranger’s attention is what i was craving. i didn’t want to chit chat or care how i acted, i just wanted to lie down and be touched. christina was amazing. super chill and easy to be around. she asked me what my goals were. i was honest, i have no clue what i want. that’s exactly how my soul was feeling. she burned sage and had me focus on a white light entering my crown chakra while allowing black sand to leave my hands and feet- symbolizing everything i wanted to let go of. she started at my head, not quite touching me and slowly moved to touch the back of my head. by the time she was actually touching me i was somewhere else. somewhere else.

i have experienced this feeling many times before. often times in mediation, savasana and during some bodywork sessions. it’s an elusive feeling, something i’d like to feel more often. i believe its the space where the deepest healing happens. this state turns off the inner critic, thoughts float in and float out effortlessly. often times there are no real thoughts. it’s almost as if the body tells the mind to get out of the way for a bit. letting the body do what it does best, just be. whats happening there and why is touch one of the portals to this state?

I found this YouTube interview with one of my favorite teachers Fritz Smith the founder of Zero Balancing. If you have not received a ZB (as it is affectionalty called) I highly recommend it. Most ZB sessions i have recevied have brought me to this state almost immediately. In this video he explains this mechanism in his typical earthy way.

what is it about someone touching you that almost short circuits the monkey mind? is it the quality of the touch? is it the quality of the moment? a beautiful combination of the both perhaps.  what about your state as the person receiving the touch? do you need to be in a specific state? I do not plan on figuring out this mechanism. i feel it’s worth a lifetime of inquiry.

when i feel this state the essence of the moment washes over me and is with me for hours afterward. a feeling of being fully in my body without the fear that can and oftentimes accompany that. this state creates a feeling of trusting the moment in which i am residing. is it the human contact? the ram dass quote “we are all just walking each other home” comes to mind. is this somewhere else a moment in which two souls realize what they are doing. just walking each other home… to the present moment. where it doesn’t matter if your bills are all caught up or if your lover has disappeared and its your doing or the big question of what the hell are we all really doing here anyway?

there isn’t any research as to why touch is a way of accessing this state, all we can do is speculate. however im glad it is one of the many ways to access this state, it makes my career so much more intriguing and rewarding!

 

thoughts?